Story Dam: Regifting

It’s not easy being me. Oh, you think I exaggerate? Are YOU size XL boxers with big blue whales over them? No? Exactly.

It’s difficult enough being boxers of any kind but XL? You’re really limited to who may buy you. I’ve watched my friends on the rack, the confident size S, the spunky size M, heck even size L has it pretty good. There are some fine lookin’ men coming in to buy those pairs (what, you thought since I was a pair of boxers I’d be male? No honey, I’m all lady). But XL? I get the huge sweaty dudes pawing at me. Gross.

But I didn’t lose hope. And one day…she came in. At first I was a tad disappointed it was a woman buying me. But she was an attractive woman; the odds were good she was married to someone good looking, even if he might be bigger.

I waited in breathless anticipation during the entire car ride home only to be shoved into a bottom drawer! The nerve! But, it was better than the rack at the store. So I curled up and waited until that drawer was pulled open and I was pulled hurriedly out of the bag. This was it! My moment!…Or not. I tried to see my potential new owner only to be shoved in a box!

So I waited…again…are you seeing a pattern here? I wait around A LOT. Luckily this wait wasn’t long. I could hear my box being ripped open, I pasted on a huge welcoming grin (yes, I can grin…you just have to look really close) and saw…another girl. A skinny one. Frowning at me. She held me up against her body and said, “Seriously? Who gives boxers?”

I don’t blame her. I think two of her might have fit in me. Not the most thoughtful gift. I watched as she shoved me back into the box and I was forgotten again.

Later that evening she pulled me out and showed me to her boyfriend (he was hot but even he couldn’t wear me…sigh…those lucky size M’s, they get all the hotties).

“Can you believe someone put boxers in the Christmas exchange? What an ass.”

“I bet it was your brother.” The guy replied. The girl smiled slyly.

“I have an idea,” she grinned. “I’ll take the boxers around places with me, take pictures of them at school, at the mall, everywhere! I’ll make a scrap book and regift them at next year’s exchange. It’ll be hilarious!”

Even I had to smile at that idea. So clever! And I’d get to see the world. It was no “hugging-a-hottie’s-ass” but it would do. The stories I could tell my fellow boxers….I’d be famous!

I was placed in a drawer again but it wouldn’t be for long. Soon I would get to see all these places I heard the people talking about as they shopped in my store: the movies, university, parks, playgrounds…I couldn’t wait!

But wait I did…for a whole year. No trips, no photos. Eventually I was pulled out and hurriedly shoved into yet another box, wrapped up, and given away…and once again I was opened up and looked at with scorn.

“Seriously? Who put this into the exchange??”

~*~*~

You get to play the part of the gift (Mwah ha ha!) Write a piece in which you, the gift, have fulfilled your destiny—to be given to someone… only they don’t want you. Good luck!

Oh and FYI, this is based on a REAL story. Not the talking boxer part, but how they were given